Holy Sonnet 10
I was in Edwin's class.. all 14 years at Ferrahian. There is this poem that has always been one of my favorites and really helps me when I think of Edwin's death.
Death, be not proud, thou some have called thee Mighty and dreadful, for thou art not so; For those whom thou think'st thou dost overthrow Die not, poor Death, nor yet canst thou kill me.
From rest and sleep, which but thy pictures be, Much pleasure; then from thee much more must flow, And soonest our best men with thee do go, Rest of their bones, and soul's delivery.
Thou art slave to fate, chance, kings, and desperate men, And dost with poison, war, and sickness dwell, And poppy or charms can make us sleep as well And better than thy stroke; why swell'st thou then?
One short sleep past, we wake eternally
And death shall be no more; Death, thou shalt die.
Submitted by Sareene Proodian
All Is Well
Death is nothing at all,
I have only slipped into the next room
I am I and you are you
Whatever we were to each other, that we are still.
Call me by my old familiar name,
Speak to me in the easy way which you always used
Put no difference in your tone,
Wear no forced air of solemnity or sorrow
Laugh as we always laughed at the little jokes we enjoyed together.
Play, smile, think of me, pray for me.
Let my name be ever the household world that it always was,
Let it be spoken without effect, without the trace of shadow on it.
Life means all that it ever meant.
It it the same as it ever was, there is unbroken continuity.
Why should I be out of mind because I am out of sight?
I am waiting for you, for an interval, somewhere very near,
Just around the corner.
All is well.
read by: Serj Topjian as part of Edwin's Euology
If Tomorrow Starts Without Me
If tomorrow starts without me,
And I'm not there to see,
If the sun should rise and find your eyes
All filled with tears for me;
I wish so much you wouldn't cry
The way you did today,
While thinking of the many things,
We didn't get to say.
I know how much you love me,
As much as I love you,
And each time that you think of me,
I know you'll miss me too;
But when tomorrow starts without me,
Please try to understand,
That an angel came and called my name,
And took me by the hand,
And said my place was ready,
In heaven far above,
And that I'd have to leave behind
All those I dearly love.
But as I turned to walk away,
A tear fell from my eye,
For all my life, I'd always thought,
I didn't want to die.
I had so much to live for,
So much left yet to do,
It seemed almost impossible,
That I was leaving you.
I thought of all the yesterdays,
The good ones and the bad,
I thought of all that we shared,
And all the fun we had.
If I could relive yesterday,
Just even for a while,
I'd say good-bye and kiss you
And maybe see you smile.
But then I fully realized,
That this could never be,
For emptiness and memories,
Would take the place of me.
And when I thought of worldly things,
I might miss some tomorrow,
I thought of you, and when I did,
My heart was filled with sorrow.
But when I walked through heaven's
I felt so much at home.
When God looked down and smiled at
From His great golden throne,
He said, "This is eternity,
And all I've promised you."
Today your life on earth is past,
But here life starts anew.
I promise no tomorrow,
But today will always last,
And since each day is the same way,
There's no longing for the past.
So when tomorrow starts without me,
Don't think we're far apart,
For every time you think of me,
I'm right here, in your heart "
Submitted by Hampik Shahinian
How do you live your dash?
I read of a man who stood to speak
At the funeral of a friend
He referred to the dates on her tombstone
From the beginning... to the end.
He noted that first came her date of birth
And spoke the following date with tears,
But he said what mattered most of all
Was the dash between those years. (1934 -1998)
For that dash represents all the time
That she spent alive on earth...
And now only those who loved her
Know what that little line is worth.
For it matters not, how much we own;
The cars... the house... the cash,
What matters is how we live and love
And how we spend our dash.
So think about this long and hard...
Are there things you'd like to change?
For you never know how much time is left,
That can still be rearranged.
If we could just slow down enough
To consider what's true and real,
And always try to understand
The way other people feel.
And be less quick to anger,
And show appreciation more
And love the people in our lives
Like we've never loved before.
If we treat each other with respect,
And more often wear a smile...
Remembering that this special dash
Might only last a little while.
So, when your eulogy's being read
With your life's actions to rehash...
Would you be proud of the things they say
About how you spent your dash?
As I sit here looking at Edwin’s web site, it brings tears
to my eyes. I sometimes find my self going on here every
so often to see the new pictures and read all the new
posts and writings. Although I did not know Edwin, only
seeing him around once or twice, I knew many people
who did. The sorrow in my friends eyes is unexplainable.
Why did someone who was giving so much to everyone
and the people around him, have to go? It anger’s me
though because along with many others, I feel as though
it was not his time.
Seeing Edwin’s pictures, it was as though I could feel the
magnetic personality that everyone was attracted to.
Along with his piercing smile that makes you chuckle a
little every time you see it because of how adorable it
was. It didn't matter if it is a picture or in person, you can
tell how much he affected everyone’s lives. I do not
blame Edwin’s family for being devastated over this sad
loss, but we had him for a long period of time, now it is a
chance for everyone above the clouds to meet this
extraordinary person. Sooner or later those who knew
him and those who did not, will get a chance sooner or
later to meet Edwin. Whether it is tomorrow or in 10
years, Edwin will greet all of us at the golden gates with
his big, warm, and comforting smile.
My condolences are with the Isaghoulian Family
We'll Meet Again
Time to go, the light awaits
A friendly face by open gates
It's not about what's left behind
But peace and joy you're soon to find
Close your eyes be not afraid
Life's not about how long you stayed
It's a reflection of the lives you touch
To whom you've cared and loved so much
The time is short, yet all is done
You need not race the setting sun
For dawn is near a world anew
Is there and is awaiting you
The time for tears is long since gone
Its time for you to be moving in
No need this time for long good-byes
We'll meet again just close your eyes
Submitted by Aline Khatchadourian
I wish I had pics for you but I don't. I just visited your site and
the pictures of Edwin are beautiful. You see I just found out
about his passing today at school. My english teacher came in
with Edwin's picture and explained what had happened. I was
first shocked then became depressed. I never really knew
Edwin. I saw him most of the time in class. I sat right
behind him. He seemed to be a normal guy. As my English
professor put it, he was a happy person.
To be honest I never really knew anyone close in my life to
ever pass away. Unfortunately, I had to find out what had
happened to my classmate. I regret never really engaging in
conversation with him. I try to keep to myself but now I wish I
can go back in time to get to know him. I'm sure he was a
great person, full of energy and life. I am certain that he had
many friends and loved ones that constantly poured love and
support to him. I couldn't attend anymore classes after
English today. I felt unable to stay in CSUN with the knowledge
that I will never see this person again in my entire life. I regret
never speaking to him.
My condolonces go out to you and his entire family. This
whole incident makes me realize how utterly fragile our
existence truly is. But I pray that Edwin is in a far better place
now. Thank you for hearing me out, and again I apologize for
your loss. God bless.
No amount of feelings, no list of endless memories, no collection
of intricate words can describe the kindest, funniest, gentlest
most considerate person to ever set foot onto this planet.
At such a young age, Edwin has brought more happiness into our
lives than anyone can ever wish to create in a lifetime.
The smiles he brought to us will never be forgotten.
The warmth of his hugs will always remain.
His memory will NEVER leave us and he will always be the Edwin
we know, cherish, respect and love.
You will always remain in our hearts… You will always be loved
…and you will never be replaceable
We love you more than words can even begin to express.
WHEN Death’s pale angel stands before my face?
With smile unfathomable, stern and chill,
And when my sorrows with my soul exhale,
Know yet, my friends, that I am living still.
When at my head a waxen taper slim
With its cold rays the silent room shall fill,
A taper with a face that speaks of death,
Yet know, my friends, that I am living still.
When, with my forehead glittering with tears,
They in a shroud enfold me, cold and chill
As any stone, and lay me on a bier,
Yet know, my friends, that I am living still.
When the sad bell shall toll—that bell, the laugh
Of cruel Death, which wakes an icy thrill—
And when my bier is slowly borne along,
Yet know, my friends, that I am living still.
When the death-chanting priests, dark browed, austere,
With incense and with prayers the air shall fill,
Rising together as they, pass along,
Yet know, my friends, that I am living still.
When they have set my tomb in order fair,
And when, with bitter sobs and wailing shrill,
My dear ones from the grave at length depart,
Yet know, my friends, I shall be living still.
But when my grave forgotten shall remain
In some dim nook, neglected and passed by,—
When from the world my memory fades away,
That is the time when I indeed shall die!
Submitted by Nanor Tavoukjian
To Those I Love and Those Who Love Me
When I am gone, release me, let me go,
I have so many things to see and do,
You mustn't tie yourself to me with tears.
Be happy that we had so many years.
I gave you my love, You can only guess,
How much you gave to me in happiness.
I thank you for the love you each have shown,
But now it is time I travel alone.
So greive a while for if grieve you must,
then let your grief be, comforted by trust.
It's only for awhile that we must part,
so bless the memories within your heart.
I won't be far away, for life goes on.
So if you need me, call and I will come.
Though you can't see or touch me, I'll be near.
And if you listen with your heart, you'll hear,
All of my love around you, soft and clear.
And then, when you must come this way alone,
I'll greet you with a smile, and say,.......
Because you and my son are the same age, I had the pleasure of
knowing you since your childhood. It was indeed a joy seeing you
graduate with my son and later on, travel with us to Armenia ;
where you two were roommates. You were kind and thoughtful for
volunteering to help us backstage during our performances, as
well as with the videotaping. Your bright and outgoing personality
formed friendships with our dance group members that lasted far
longer than our two week adventure. My absolute deepest
condolences reach out to the many loved ones you left behind. To
those seeking some solace, I offer this excerpt from the Bible:
Lord is my shepherd,
I shall not want
He maketh me to lie down in green pastures
He leadeth me beside the still waters.
He restoreth my soul,
He leadeth me in the paths of righteousness
yea, though I walk through the valley of shadow of death,
I will fear no evil, for thou art with me
Thy rod and they staff, they comfort me
Thou preparest a table in the presence of mine enemies
Thou anointest my head with oil, my cup runneth over.
Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life
And I will dwell in the house of the Lord forever.
This has been a very tragic week for the Armenian
community. We not only lost a wonderful son and brother,
a great friend, and a caring and down to earth individual,
but we lost a fellow Armenian soldier. Edwin's passion for
Hayasdan and Hye Tad was very admirable. I just hope his
friends will carry on the work he left behind...
I want to dedicate two Armenian songs In Edwins Loving
The first song is called 'Akhpers oo Yes' by Karnig
The second song is called 'Ankeen Yeghpayr' by Harout
Pamboukjian.."Indz lseer ankeen yeghpayr, khosk oonem
kez aseloo, pari makhdoomner daloo, pari makdoomner
daloo..Gyankoom vad orer choonenas, eem ojakheen
anmar grag, leenes haghtov, leenes paghdov, ANKEEN
YEGHPAYR, GYANKUD YERGAR...
Until we meet again....
A book he liked: The Tragic Sense of
Life by Miguel de Unamuro
Quotes he loved: “Gather ye rosebuds
while ye may/Old time is still a-
flying/And this same flower that smiles
today/Tomorrow will be dying”
“Confusion is untamed emotions”
Quotes by Edwin:
“…I think one of my goals in life would
be to find out what is it that makes the
most perfect of gods creations so
weak and prone to fear and worry. How
can something so advanced in speech,
social skills and death be so not
perfect when emotions are involved
even for a millisecond….” August 4,
“…I was thinking of my whole year and
of how fast everything flew by. I feel as
if I’m the luckiest guy alive, I have my
health, my friends, my family.” May 22,
“…Damn next week were going to
Armenia, it’s the biggest trip, seriously.
I’ve read, learned, sang and talked
about it for 14 years and now I’m finally
going to see what I’ve learned about….
My dad was telling me to keep my eyes
open for land that’s for sale there. He
wants to buy land in Armenia, I think,
and build a house there…that would
be sick….” May 25, 2003
“…This New Year’s I’ve come to the
conclusion of, life should always be
enjoyed. To cloud your mind of foolish
things like gossip or other negative
ideas just brings sadness and
loneliness. My way of enjoying my life
is being with people, individuals who I
hold dearly…” January 1, 2004
“…my Anthropology class has ignited a
flame in me to find the root cause of
why humans, as a species, are so damn
emotional. We are 98% identical to
Chimpanzee DNA and yet they come
nowhere close to the level of emotions
we feel, express and go through. Its
become a primary mission as of lately
to know why…” February 23, 2004
Submitted by Anna Melkonyan
Like an unbelievable dream, or horrific nightmare, people come
into and vanish out of our lives as brief frames of existence. They
make us question our being and all that is around us, seeking to
find answers, truths and explanations to the events that have
passed. While much is left unexplained, one factor is certain: life
is short, and cruel. One moment, it is present, while seconds later
it ceases to exist. Unfortunately, tragedies seem to be necessary
to bring perspective into our lives.
Edwin’s life should be an inspiration to us all. With his energy,
compassion and spirit, he managed to touch so many lives and
make an impact that will last forever through each of our
memories. Though I only knew Edwin for a brief period of time, his
magnetic personality created a bond that is irreplaceable. I have
been trying with all my might to make sense of why such a beautiful
person would have to leave us. I keep waiting for the moment
when he will jump out from behind a corner and say, “Haha, tricked
you guys!” Unfortunately, it seems that won’t be happening. Never
have I met a person with such a lack of negativity; that could put a
smile on anyone’s face, regardless of the circumstance. Whether it
was the way he would hug you after not seeing you for a long time
or tell you how much he missed and loved you each time you
conversed, his warmth and character were a gift from God to us
all. Although he is no longer with us, the ability to have had
someone of his caliber in our lives at one point or another should
be reason for each of us to smile. He is in a better place now, for
Each day that you are granted the gift of life must be reason to
celebrate the people that give it meaning, as Edwin did - both ones
that occupy it currently, and ones that have come and gone.
Adverse circumstances such as this make it necessary to realize
that conflict is useless and a futile waste of energy. Love is the
only means of beating life at its game, because it is the only thing
that is eternal. Edwin, you were loved by us all and will be missed
more then words can express. Rest in peace - you are in good